when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
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