1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Randomize