When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
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i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
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Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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