Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
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I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
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I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
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