sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
not ubering you a puppy
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