Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
hell yes lets make some ravioli
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
