addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Randomize
