is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
Randomize
