When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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