my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
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