No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
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