You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
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