well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize
