i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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