Who wears a wallet chain?!
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Randomize
