he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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