Got a toothbrush?
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
Its about making memories worth repressing
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
I can't turn off my feet"
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize
