What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Randomize
