I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
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So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
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She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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