Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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