when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Randomize
