saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
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