last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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