sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize