does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
