Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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