you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
do herpes really smell.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Randomize
