can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
Holy sore nipples Batman
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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