I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
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