We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Randomize
