i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize
