New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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