Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
