They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
