ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Randomize