ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
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