Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Randomize
