"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
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