It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Randomize
