Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
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