I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
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Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
i think im in europe. pls send help
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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