i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
