Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
The air taste purple.
Randomize