we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Randomize
