whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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