i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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