honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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