Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Randomize