I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
My pussy is not your playground.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Randomize
