I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
