So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
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