I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize