HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
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